Let me begin by emphasizing that suicide is a terribly tragic thing. It should never ever be romanticized or glorified and anything that can be done to prevent it should be done.
There seems to be this idea that suicide equals selfishness and giving up. That it means someone decided that just because life got hard, they were done. This is not true at all. While suicide is a choice, it is not made just because someone is too lazy to fight their problems.
Imagine you are extremely claustrophobic, and you are in a small room with no windows or doors. As time goes on, the walls start getting closer together, and the ceiling starts moving closer to your head and to the floor. At first you were able to stand up, but eventually you have to crouch, and then kneel, and finally you are forced to ball yourself up into the fetal position. This would be scary for anyone, but someone who is claustrophobic would be panicking before they even had to crouch. This person would be desperate to escape, and by the time they were forced to curl up, they would be willing to use any means necessary to get out.
This is what depression feels like. The best word I have ever heard used to describe depression is "trapped." That's exactly what it is. You are trapped in your own head with your own thoughts and with oceans of despair that you struggle to swim through. Suicide is not what happens when you get tired of swimming, or tired of treading water, or even tired of floating on your back. It is what happens when you have reached a point that you literally cannot see a way to keep swimming. The only possible solution for escape that a person who has reached this low point can see is to drown. (I would like to note that different people experience depression and other struggles in different ways. Not everyone becomes suicidal, like not everyone inflicts self harm, or stops going to work or school, or gets angry at God, or stops eating, etc. Point being, even if you have faced serious struggles and have not felt like ending your life is the only option, that doesn't mean others have not felt that way.)
What makes suicide so tragic is that the person who committed or attempted it had completely lost hope, and not because they weren't trying to find it. To them, all they were able to see was a life of never-ending despair. A person dealing with this is not someone who should be blamed for being selfish or weak or unwilling. This is a person who desperately needs love and help.
This being said, even a suicidal person who has dealt with depression or some other struggle that leaches them of all hope and purpose and who can see no light at the end of the tunnel retains enough will power to ask for help. I asked for help when I started to feel like I hurt so much that living was a burden, and it has made all the difference. However, asking for help was very very hard for me to do. Being the oldest kid in my family, I feel like I have to be this perfect golden child. To admit that I was not okay was not easy. I fought the tears and tried to appear strong even as I told my mom how much I was struggling. As hard as that was, it was worth it.
Unfortunately, not everyone seeks help. Perhaps they don't know who to ask or how. I don't pretend to know all of the reasons why people don't ask, but judging them for that is not my place. This is the point I most want to emphasize: It is not our place to judge someone, especially for things we know nothing about. It isn't anyone's place other than God's. Our job is to love sincerely, be sensitive, provide support, and always be kind.
If you or someone you know has had suicidal thoughts, or has even just mentioned it in passing (ALWAYS take that seriously, by the way), please take advantage of these resources. Even if you don't think you will need them, I encourage you to put the numbers in your phone anyway and keep these resources close.
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